Lowkey, there’s a whole vibe going around our generation: we’re lonely as hell. And it’s not just a ~feeling~, it’s a full-blown epidemic.
So… Why Do We Feel So Isolated?
Good question. Let’s break it down:
- The ‘Gram is a Lie. Everyone’s feed is a perfectly curated highlight reel. It’s hard to slide into a friend’s DMs like “hey, having a crisis, wanna eat cold pizza and watch Netflix?” when their life looks like a TikTok aesthetic board.
- Doomscrolling is a Time-Suck. An hour on TikTok disappears in a second. That’s an hour you could’ve been… I don’t know, actually with people? Texting is easy. Making real plans takes effort, and our brains are fried.
- Too Many Options, Zero Plans. We have endless apps to meet people, but it’s like we’re paralyzed by choice. It’s easier to stay home than to commit.
- The Pandemic Messed Us Up. Let’s be real, we got used to being alone. Jumping back into the social scene can feel like trying to run in a dream.
This Isn’t Just in Your Head, It’s Science.
The U.S. Surgeon General, Dr. Vivek Murthy, dropped a report that basically confirmed our collective fear. He said that being chronically lonely is as bad for your health as smoking 15 cigarettes a day.
Let that sink in. A lack of real connection is literally killing us. It’s not about having a million followers; it’s about having two or three people you can text at 3 a.m. with your weirdest thoughts.
Okay, But What’s the Fix? (No, it’s not deleting your finsta.)
We’re not saying you have to throw your phone in a river. It’s about being more intentional.
1. Start Small, No Pressure.
- Say “Yes” to the Weird Stuff. Someone asks if you wanna check out a random flea market or get boba? Just say yes. Even if it’s mid, you tried.
- Find Your People. That indie band you love is playing a tiny show. GO. That book club, hiking group, or volunteer gig? Show up. Shared interests are cheat codes for friendship.
- Embrace the “Micro-Yes.” “Wanna walk to 7/11 for slushies?” is a valid and elite social plan.
2. Level Up Your Online Life.
- Use the App, Don’t Let It Use You. See a story of people at a cool pop-up? Reply “omg where is this?” instead of just liking it. Use social media to make plans, not just watch them.
- Curate Your Crap. Unfollow anyone who makes you feel like a potato. Your feed should be a happy place, not a soul-crushing scroll.
- Send the “No, For Real” Text. Instead of another meme, try “hey, how are you actually doing?”
3. Embrace the Awkward.
Making new friends is cringe at first. The first hangout might be a little quiet. That’s fine! Everyone is nervous. Put your phone in your bag, make some eye contact, and be present. The awkwardness will pass.
The Bottom Line:
If you’re reading this feeling seen, just know you are SO not alone. This is our generation’s shared struggle. The first step is admitting it. The next step is sending that one text or buying that one ticket.
Your phone is a great wingman, but it’s a terrible date. Go be the main character IRL for a bit.
So spill the tea. How do you deal with the lonely feels? Drop your best tips in the comments!